Tick tick..

Ok, got home from gym, slugged down the Alive elixir so we'll see. Although in fairness I can't really think it would make a change in two days. If it hasn't then I'll pass out in about 90 minutes.

I've started driving to the school early so I can crash in my car rather then trying to stay awake and drive,lol.

Expecting both he vid and the kettlebell stuff today. Should be interesting. I hope it's interesting. Exercise freakin bores me to tears. Seriously, I've knitted while using the bicycling thingy at the gym.

I hate that machine so no I try and listen to a book and watch tv while on the Elliptical or whatever. Problem with that is I always seem to end up under the machine with Today on it and it takes about five minutes before I want to knock Kathy Lee and whatever her name is head's together.

They are usually right next to Rachel Ray. Who had super fat ladies on complaining about no 'Fat Fashion'. Yeah, all I could think of was me fifteen years, ten years, five years ago thinking the same way. Give those really fat ladies a few years and when the body starts to complain finding clothes isn't gonna look like quite the injustice it seems.

As if not making clothes over a size 18/20 to 22/24 is a Hate Crime. Priorities ladies, trust me. The turning point for me, besides my health? When I realised I'd never seen a really old really fat lady advocating for fat acceptance. In fact, while I see lots of old ladies all the time, I never see a really old really fat lady.

And the older ones I've seen, have all been in scooters. You can accept all you want to , but we were all pretty much born with the same skeletal structure. As far as the myth of Fat and Fit when you look at skeletons of obese folks, the bones show signs of strain and sometimes even fracture.

And if you are reading this and any of it rings a bell, please, take care of yourself before you hit forty, cause at 45 this shit is hard, yo (as my friend knotworkshop says). Looking back I realise my whole fat acceptance insistence was really defensiveness. It's not normal, it's not healthy and frankly, while I think everyone is entitled to be how ever heavy they choose to be, gone are the days when I think it's just oky doky anymore then I can be convinced being a smoker is.

It simply defies logic.